This is me. It’s so much quicker than using a pen and writing in a diary, isn’t it? So here I am. I’ve spent most of my life in a corner of England, only occasionally venturing further afield. I thought life would be simple, perhaps – if I was lucky enough – like a fairy tale. As it turned out, it wasn’t, I didn’t and I’m here now wanting to share with random strangers in cyberspace. I grew up in a pretty traditional home, 2 younger sisters and my folks are still together after 30 odd years now. The situation with my family is a bit shit. A lot of people can relate, I imagine. They don’t know me and I don’t know them. And I hate them. I’ve pretty much divorced myself from them for the time being. I can’t please them, no matter what I do, so I figure it’s just easier to not be involved with them any longer. As the eldest child in the family, it was expected that I be the achiever. And in a lot of ways, I was, and still am. I’ve done a lot of things that my siblings haven’t, and experienced things that those twice, even 3 times my age, will never know. I’ve been through hell and have come out the other side stronger. I now live in a beautiful village, with my partner and our 2 gorgeous yet total pain-in-the-ass children. They go to school and I sit at home staring at this computer screen, trying to write a masterpiece. In the main, I get sidetracked by playing with the cat who lives at number 7 because she is pretty and has a nice meow. They call her Chi Chi, I call her Sylvia because that’s, like, a proper name, of course. If you’re looking for vapid and hackneyed content, this is not the place for you. I use profanity with disregard and am not averse to a little blasphemy. As you were.